Ah yes, the never-ending flow of pharmacological spam never fails to astonish me, particularly when the spammers are taking the leap of faith that I would buy a drug that might well be life or death important from someone who can’t spell and has to use tricks to even get their mail into my mailbox. Not to mention the ethics of Vioxx lawyers who solicit any and all people to try and build a class action lawsuit and garner 20-50% of the payout for themselves.

It is interesting to consider which drugs do what, however. Here’s what I could dig up from the National Institutes of Health…

Ambien is actually a drug called Zolpidem and it’s used short-term to treat insomnia (to help you fall asleep and stay asleep for a proper rest).

Ativan is actually a drug called Lorazepam and it’s used to relieve anxiety. “Lorazepam can be habit-forming. Do not take a larger dose, take it more often, or for a longer time than your doctor tells you to. Tolerance may develop with long-term or excessive use, making the drug less effective. Do not take lorazepam for more than 4 months or stop taking this medication without talking to your doctor. Stopping the drug suddenly can worsen your condition and cause withdrawal symptoms (anxiousness, sleeplessness, and irritability). Your doctor probably will decrease your dose gradually.”

Botox actually isn’t a drug that you would buy from a pharmacist, so I’m not sure how it got on your list. It’s actually botulinum toxin and it’s injected into your skin, typically around your eyes, to temporarily remove wrinkles and frown lines. Myobloc is another variant of botulinum that is used for cosmetic purposes too.

Cialis is properly known as Tadalafil and here’s what NIH has to say about it: “Tadalafil is used to treat erectile dysfunction (impotence; inability to get or keep an erection) in men. Tadalafil is in a class of medications called phosphodiesterase (PDE) inhibitors. It works by increasing blood flow to the penis during sexual stimulation. This increased blood flow can cause an erection. Tadalafil does not cure erectile dysfunction or increase sexual desire. Tadalafil does not prevent pregnancy or the spread of sexually transmitted diseases such as human immunodeficiency virus (HIV).”

Levitra, known properly as Vardenafil, is also a phosphodiesterase (PDE) inhibitor and is used to treat erectile dysfunction in men.

Oxycontin is used to treat moderate to severe pain. Oxycontin is also frequently abused, and the government and various agencies are clamping down on prescription abuse (which makes it all the more surprising that any online pharmacy, however dubious, is even advertising it!)

Phentermine, also known as (ready for this?) Adipex, Anoxine, Fastin, Ionamin, Obephen, Obermine, Obestin-30 and Phentrol, is used to decrease your appetite and help you lose weight. Be careful, though: it’s habit forming: “Most people take the drug for 3-6 weeks; the length of treatment depends on how you respond to the medication. Phentermine can be habit-forming. Do not take a larger dose, take it more often, or for a longer period than your doctor tells you to.”

Valium, known formally as Diazipam, is used to relieve anxiety, muscle spasms, seizures, and to control agitation caused by alcohol withdrawal. Valium was a very popular tranquilizer in the 60s and 70s and is the theme of the Rolling Stones song “Mother’s Little Helper”, among other things. It’s commonly prescribed by dentists, ophthalmic surgeons, and others prior to in-office operations.

Viagra, known formally as Sildenafil, is used to treat impotence in men. It should be taken about one hour prior to sexual activity (though prescription recommendations range from 30 minutes to four hours prior to sexual activity). You shouldn’t take more than one of these a day either.

Vicodin is a combination of Acetaminophen and Hydrocodone. The former should sound familiar: it’s asprin. Other names for Vicodin include Lorcet-HD, Panacet, Zydone and Hydrocodone. It’s used to treat moderate to moderately severe pain, and can be habit-forming.

Vioxx, known formally as Rofecoxib, “is used to relieve the pain, tenderness, inflammation (swelling), and stiffness caused by arthritis and to treat painful menstrual periods and pain from other causes. Rofecoxib is in a class of nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory medications (NSAIDs) called COX-2 inhibitors. It works by stopping the body’s production of a substance that causes pain and inflammation. COX-2 inhibitors may cause less stomach bleeding and ulcers than similar medications.” However, after much prodding, Merck, the multi-billion-dollar pharmaceutical manufacturer of Vioxx, withdrew the product from the market due to safety concerns regarding increased risk of heart attacks and strokes in patients. Who would still be buying this from any pharmacy, let alone a fly-by-night Internet one?? On the other hand, given the phenomenal payouts for other drug liability cases, is it any wonder that there’s now a wave of Vioxx lawyers doing their best to cut themselves in on the probable gravytrain of Vioxx lawsuits? BusinessWeek believes that when the lawsuits are all settled, multi-billion dollar Merck will actually be bankrupt.

Finally, Xanax, like Valium and many other drugs, is what’s known as a Benzodiazepine, a drug that slows down the central nervous system. They’re primarily used as anti-anxiety and sedative drugs.

There! Now you know more about all these oddly-named drugs than anyone should know, and are probably scratching your head saying “why on Earth would some spammer think I’d buy these from an unknown, unregulated pharmacy?” I’d agree with you, it just doesn’t make any sense to me at all.

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