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Managing Yahoo Instant Messenger (YIM) Buddy Lists?

I have a few questions about Yahoo! messenger (YIM), since they don't supply customer support. When I add someone to my 'buddies' list, I have one of two scenarios to play out afterwards.

1) The other person logs online and decides to either “accept and allow me” to add them, or to “not accept and not allow me” to add them in which case they disappear from my buddies list, or

2) The other person logs online, but appears to never make the choice about allowing me to add them or not, and they just remain in my buddies list forever.

So my first question is how can #2 happen? Doesn't everyone who has YIM get forced on the screen to make the choice between allowing or not allowing someone to be on the buddies list?

My second question that flows from this, is let's say that I have allowed someone to put me on their buddies list - what if I want to stop that at some point? there is the command that says 'delete friend', but that seems to apply to someone I made a friend from my end, no someone who made *me* a friend from their end....there is also the 'ignore friend' option, but doesn't that just block their message from reaching me (and hence I don't know they are sending it), rather than actually preventing them from knowing when I am on line (as a buddy).

So in other words, once you allow someone to add you as a buddy, how can you ever *disallow that*?

Dave's Answer:

The answer your first question is yes. Everyone who uses YIM receives a dialog box when someone wants to add them. It’s only in the latest version that you are actually forced to choose, in older versions of YIM you were able to bypass the “Add Buddy” process by clicking Cancel.

As for your second question the answer is block. You’ll want to “delete friend” and possibly “ignore friend” but before you do either of those you’ll want to block them that way they won’t know when you’re online.

To block someone:

1) Right-click their name
2) Select Stealth Settings
3) Choose Permanently Offline
4) Click OK

Here's what the Stealth Settings looks like:

Yahoo Instant Messenger YIM Stealth Settings

After that you need to delete them from your friend's list, then go ahead add them to your Ignore List by clicking Preferences --> Ignore List --> Add and typing their name.

That should address your YIM (Yahoo Instant Messenger) questions, I hope!

Thanks to Mya Leigh for her help with this question.

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Categorized: Computer and Internet Basics (Article 4692)
Tagged: yahoo messenger, yim
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Comments

this question needs to be answered... I am on a MAC as was the person asking the question, i guess.

Anyone know the answer?

Posted by: bob at February 14, 2006 9:13 AM

How can i remove myself from someone else list?
If the other has me on his list how can i remove myself?

Posted by: debt consolidation at March 13, 2006 12:27 PM

yes,how do you delete my name from there list,they always know when im on,and i want my name off there list,how do i do it,thankyou

Posted by: freddie at March 30, 2006 10:45 AM

Here's another possible solution:

http://www.modernmorph.com/downloads/comment.php?dlid=77

Posted by: programming_geek at April 3, 2006 12:10 PM

I do not understand how to add a yahoo.com customer to my aol.com IM buddy list. I'm new at the computer and I just don't understand what I'm doing wrong.

Posted by: cynthia mettlach at April 4, 2006 9:08 PM

I want to retrieve the buddy list of a remote yahoo id. How can i get it. Please help me.

Posted by: Thomas at July 22, 2006 6:34 AM

hello, short question
how can i find out if i am on somebody's buddy list?

Posted by: qqq at August 29, 2006 7:32 AM

For 2 days now my Yahoo IM won't open . I'm on a Mac and the little spinning circle has been spinning for hours without giving me a error message or letting me on to my Yahoo IM

WHATS WRONG ?

Posted by: robert Carsten at October 9, 2006 8:23 AM

how do i add a contact to the mesenger list?

Posted by: brandi at December 22, 2006 6:29 AM

I do not understand how to add a yahoo.com customer to my aol.com IM buddy list. I'm new at the computer and I just don't understand what I'm doing wrong.

Posted by: maggie at December 29, 2006 11:08 AM

I want to know when did last 2 times my yahoo messanger gets login - with dates & time - its really important as well urgent for me.
Its a matter for life & death for me.

Posted by: Kamal Jeet Singh at February 8, 2007 4:25 AM

When talking to a friend on yahoo messenger she can hear me and I can't hear her. we went through all the instructions and trouble shooting help but still have the same problem.

Posted by: Raymond at March 10, 2007 2:04 PM

How do u instant message someone who has a different computer than yours?

Posted by: Heather at March 18, 2007 2:51 PM

How Can I Delete My Own self
Off Of My Friend's Buddy List
Help Please and How Can I Change My Buddy's
Password He Changed Mine

Posted by: Angel at March 25, 2007 8:28 PM

How do I ADD a friend to my yahoo list????

Posted by: Ruthie Lewis at May 21, 2007 7:05 PM

I want to know if I'm being blocked or deleted altogether from someone's buddy list. How can I find out if i've been removed (not just blocked) from someone else's buddy list?

Posted by: D at May 26, 2007 6:42 PM

how can i add someone to my buddy list and not have yahoo ask if they want to be put on buddy list?

Posted by: joe at June 12, 2007 8:34 PM

WHEN I TALK TO MY FRIEND ON YAHOO IM SEE CAN SEE MY WORDS BUT I CANT SEE HERS.

Posted by: RC at August 27, 2007 9:25 PM

Hi,
How do i change my yahoo instant messenger password?

Posted by: rob at September 11, 2007 8:42 AM

hi.how can i add sb in yahoo messenger without that person's allow?i really need it.just send it 2 me

Posted by: hamide at September 26, 2007 3:10 PM

How can I know if someone has erased from my messenger list and adress book?

Posted by: irinaf_u at October 22, 2007 1:55 PM

Actually, even if you "Block" someone by your abovementioned method, and set them to "Appear Permanently Offline"... when you delete them from your list, you remain on THEIR list, but you become VISIBLE to them, even AFTER you set them to "Appear Permanently Offline"... so if you want to REMAIN invisible to someone, you must indeed "Block" them, but you can NOT delete them from your list. Otherwise they will see you when you are available online.

This is current from personal experience as of 10/25/2007

Posted by: Jady at October 30, 2007 12:29 AM

i have had yahoo for a while now but i cant find my yahoo buddy list i try signing in and the smiley face goes back to sleep how can i get my buddies back i am computer illerate please help

Posted by: Lisa at December 14, 2007 5:26 PM

i have a problum i had a old computer that crashed i added some 1 to it and thay refuzed my add so now i want to remove my name from his or her list how can i do that now this site also i do a serch on google and find my info scatterd all over the place difrent names ill give u 1 do a serch on catmando8820002000 and you will see what i mean i want all this info gone and yes im amazed i found this out so i dont aply to any servis on line no more so my name wont be on google can u pl ansure these 2 ? i have wrote to some of the contact us dilog and still nuthing happens can u help me figure this problems out and you will be the man ty

Posted by: edward at January 30, 2008 10:12 AM

If I send a person an instant message on Yahoo Messenger and they instant message me back, does that mean that I am on their buddy list? Or can they instant message me back without me being on their list?

Posted by: brooke at February 22, 2008 7:03 PM

How can I find out that i've been removed from someone else's buddy list without asking him?

Posted by: bivas at March 3, 2008 10:11 AM

I was wondering if anyone knew of a program like AIM Minus that would add yourself to someone else's buddy list?

Posted by: Ria at March 30, 2008 4:18 AM

Some times our friends will be invisible. how can i know actually they are on line or not?

Posted by: hilal ahamed at March 30, 2008 11:57 PM

Some times our friends will be invisible. how can i know actually they are on line or not?

Posted by: hilal ahamed at March 30, 2008 11:58 PM

how can i know if i am blocked and deleted on someone's yahoo messenger?

please know that this is not about someone hiding from me or visible/invisible thing..if i am blocked my messages won't reach them even if i see them online. so how to know if i am blocked on someone's yahoo messenger list (without having to ask them of course)?

Posted by: lopa at April 18, 2008 1:51 PM

I have a buddy on my list who's tool menu does not light up. It will not let me see his profile, webcam, conference -- none of those icons are lit up -- what can he do to get thos to light up?

Posted by: Sandy at April 28, 2008 10:38 AM

I have a lot to say, but ...

I have a lot to say, and questions of my own for that matter, but most of all I'd like to say thank you for all your efforts on this Web site by buying you a chai!

I do have a comment, now that you mention it!